Friday, May 09, 2008

GUd Life - 49 - Muhammed Cartoon Fire

Enough has been said and done on the Muhammed cartoon controversy but I think it is my solemn duty as a cartoonist to give my 2-paise on all this -

cartoon on Muhammad cartoon controversy

Yes. That is right, I dont think there is anything wrong with Muslims being vocal in their disagreement of the Danish cartoons. After all, this too comes under "freedom of expression". So, to say that Muslims are over-reacting is to acknowledge that the West is putting on an air of moral superiority. Quite in what aspect, the superiority is being claimed is what that beats me.

Any case, sorry to have been away for a while. Hope you are all doing well.

Firefox Campaign

Seriously considered taking part in the Firefox flicks community video ad campaign by submitting some animation films. But as always, and being true to myself and my various disabilities, I could not get around to do them and/or on time. How very classic. Anyhoo, here are the cartoons I made for the purpose that could stand on their own or be treated as storyboards. Yes, they need polishing and I only hope someone out there will be able to see their potential (if any) and give me a helping hand to get them somewhere. The rest of this post gives the stuff I made so far with blurbs. Ideas for some more that need to be drawn. And jots of a new campaign for Firefox which I would like to take forward. No less. Any feedback and help on any of these are warmly welcome.

Cartoons
1) Security
A guy is shown browsing the web and suddenly, there is a "security breach" throbbing sign (in red and with fire-alarms) on the monitor, bugs swarm in, the computer goes ballast and the bugs come out and invade the room leaving a trail of destruction in their wake. The guy is scared driven to hide beneath the desk while the bugs go about their merry destruction. We have a voice-over with nice little message while this is going on like - "The internet is a wormhole with many threats and bugs that compromise and easily spoof security mechanisms of most browsers creating much mayhem and loss. Firefox is the only browser designed to tackle this scum. Switch to Firefox."
Firefox campaign cartoons - Ad-flicks
That is the concept anyway and although I feel that the image below does not convey the force of the description above, it is an attempt. In particular, I wanted to add frames of browsing, the warning, bugs swarming and create various types of bugs (that film Monsters Inc. is a good reference). The message also needs some heavy tuning not to mention that a closure frame is also needed with say like the Mortein commercial where a froggy Firefox logo gobbles up a bug or has a Kill-Bill kinda pose.

2) Pop-Ups
This is similar to above but more identifiable. We show a typical office and people are going about doing their things. A guy is innocently browsing and suddenly there are all kinds of pop-ups - embarassing ones like "do you need Viagra", "chat with sexy blondes" and the like. He is trying to kill them but they keep popping up. While he is doing all this, his manager passes by and has a peek into this activity and begins to mock and cajole and scold him for being so desperate. Poor guy, he is embarassed and everyone of his colleagues have different feelings for him. We end the advert with a nice little message like - "Everyday, millions of office workers in the world are embarassed because their browsers cannot effectively eliminate annoying pop-ups. Little do they know that Firefox can do it for them" culminating in a tag-line - "Dont be a loser. Switch to Firefox". And in the closure frame, a pop-up runs away when the Firefox logo drops into the frame.
Firefox campaign cartoons - Ad-flicks
In fact, I had a more animated idea as a continuation to this in mind too. When the guy is feeling depressed, a colleague comes and tells him to use Firefox. He does and he visits the same site again. But this time, the fox comes alive and gobbles up the pop-ups perhaps in a very violent way like pulling them by the head and smashing them to smitherens with hammers and swords and kung-fu (like the squirrel in Ice Age 2 trailer smashing the piranhas). We can also use a tag-line like that Domez commercial "many more pop-ups will die" as told by a man whose voice sounds like a guy who is 45 and smoking cigarettes since he was 5.

3) Speed
This is perhaps inspired from a few commercials. We pan across a room. There are clothes sprewn all over and there are screams of pleasure from a guy giving a hint of a situation of a couple having deeply passionate sex. We pan some more but the frame leads us to a beautiful girl saying goodbye to a guy who is unbothered as he is browsing the web with Firefox. It is he who is so excited and keeps saying "yesss..." "whoo baby". The message is simple - "The Firefox effect #1: Pleasure"
Firefox campaign cartoons - Ad-flicks
Actually, I think one can do many more on the lines of Firefox effect. Will detail them later.

More Ideas
1) Public broadcast message
This advert starts out like any other government message focussed on kids. We show grumpy, nasty kids with the message being - "Every single hour of every single hour, kids resort to being disagreeable. Many reasons have been attributed to this but our social research team at Firefox has been able to find out the root cause. It is the browser."
We then cut to frames where a kid is annoyed at the moodiness of the browser getting angry and frustrated. For example, the browser crashes and the kid is angry. His kid sister comes to him to get a toy repaired and he throws it away making her cry. In another situation, there are annoying pop-ups and again, the kid is frustrated. He kicks the computer and takes out his anger on a young kid outside only to be given a lesson by the bigger brother. Yet again, a download stops in the middle and yet again, the kid gets angry and this time he is being nasty to the parents at dinner time (throwing away the food etc.) who give a very worried look. And so on and so forth. For every nuisance the browser causes (like wiping out the hard-disk because of a virus), the kid reacts in an anti-social way.
The voiceover continues - "See that is evidence for you. So, if you find your kid acting angry most of the time, try to be understanding and do him a favour. Tell him to switch to Firefox". We then cut to frames where the mom (this is important, it should be the mum for the proverbial woman's touch) comes to the kid and consoles him telling him about Firefox by typing the URL. The kid uses it. Is blown away and comes to the dinner, apologizes, hugs his parents and gives the repaired toy to his kid sister. Owww... the voice continues - "Happy parents all over the world have discovered the joy Firefox brings to their families. Have you?". Then of course, there is a rapid - "Issued in public interest by the society for happy parents of Firefox".

2) Woman interview
In this one, we show a woman being interviewed. She starts off by telling of the unhappiness that prevades her life. She says - "When Jack decided to work out from home, I was very happy. But it soon started going all wrong. You see, Jack has to be online most of the time but he became increasingly frustrated. At first, I thought that it was just early jitters or the dial-up connection. So, we switched to broadband. But even then he was not happy. He was always tired and grumpy. And we did not have you-know-what for 5 months. I tried everything but nothing seemed to work. Then I discovered Firefox and installed it on the computer making it the default browser. I would be lying if I said that it did not change my life. Jack is much happier now. He gets lots of work done in a breeze and we now have all the time we need. For ourselves. Thanks Firefox."
All the time she speaks, it is not just the woman in frame. We show the action. For example, we show frames where Jack is angry with the computer. He comes into bed tired and just sleeps while she is seductively dressed with all candles glowing. We also show frames where Jack and her are now outside in the park enjoying a good life.

3) Medicine advert
I know that this would be explored by many but I think we should do a really good one on these lines -



4) Film Spoofs
I have a hunch that this would be explored by the community too. I have many ideas but one that is on my list is the conversation between Neo and Architect in "Matrix Reloaded". In our case, Neo comes into the room to find the architect. The dialogue is spookingly relevant to us even in a verbatim capacity. For example -
The Architect: IE land is stickier than you know. I prefer counting from the emergence of one integral anomaly to the emergence of the next, in which case this is the sixth version. And lots of anamolies. There is no escape.
Neo: There are only two possible explanations: either no one told me, or no one knows.
The Architect: Precisely. As you are undoubtedly gathering, the anomaly's systemic, creating fluctuations in even the most simplistic websites.
Neo: Choice. The problem is choice.
The Architect: You are here because you have no choice. You are inextricably stuck with being my slave and minion.
Neo: Bullshit. There is Firefox.
*The responses of other Neos appear on the monitors: "Bullshit!"*
The Architect: Denial is the most predictable of all human responses. But, rest assured, we have destroyed browsers before, and we have become exceedingly efficient at it.
And so on. Of course, the dialogue needs to be modified. Any takers?

5) Browser Sufferers Anonymous
We show a typical gathering of people pouring out their browser woes. Like these - "I was downloading this thing. It was 98% complete and then it crashed. I wasted...". The woman breaks down. Another says - "I hear you sister". We dont give a solution to this in the commercial. We just keep piling on the issues that Firefox solves and IE and others dont. Very identifable things. We pan out and end the frame with a simple line - "Identify with what you saw? Then it is time to change your browser. Whatever the problem, Firefox can solve it. Try it today".

6) Chick magnetism
What is any set of commercials without a geek and a beauty? This is simple and there are a number of ways to do it. One is to show a really posh race-car kind of setting scene where a beautiful woman drops a hankerchief signalling a race to download something. And the race starts with people using different browsers. Of course, the geek using Firefox wins. Yet another way to do this would be for us to show a simple lab. The cheerleaders come in and ask for something to be downloaded. Our hero uses Firefox and does the task.

7) Superhero / Mascot
At first I started out thinking of a mascot of a cute little fox. But true to my expectations, it has been done. So, I thought that maybe we can do a thing by introducing a superhero character. This is a fox with all the bells and whistles of a superhero. Cape. Eyewear. Superspeed. Supersafe. Superutility. What is imporant here is what we can do with this character. We can create comics. Or just have simple fun.

Firefox Cartoon Campaign - My Jots
I have been in touch with a friendly person, AD of the Firefox flicks and suggested to him a new kind of campaign for Firefox from the jots I made when I had a wee thinking time. To be frank, I was thinking of ways of how I can make these cartoons count in the whole scheme of things. Anyway, since I personally think that cartoons have a better shelf-life and potential for actually making some money, here are my 2-paise of how one can use cartoons to take forward a new Firefox campaign while I await AD's reply -

1) Cartoons that highlight the benefits of Firefox in a quirky and informative way can be a part of more sustained marketing efforts. It is no secret that humour catches people attention. Like having a cartoon every week on the main site or in the newsletter or whatever. In fact, we can create an archive of sorts that reporters can use whenever they write a story on Firefox. I strongly vouch for this kind of PR.

2) Cartoons are also much more easier for the community to get involved in. Everyone has ideas. Maybe, we can start a movement and people will contribute cartoons or ideas or stories (which can be made into cartoons). Once made, these cartoons can be seen as achievements and by their very nature, this can catch on. Cartoons are also easier to stick-up on noticeboards and doors and pass around.

3) Cartoons can also make money because they are so adaptive. For example, if we build up a good enough archive, this can later on be published into a book. Or images can be transferred onto coffee-cups or t-shirts or bumper-stickers or fridge-magnets etc. This can raise money for Mozilla project while also giving the community a channel to see their inputs posterizied.

Well, that is all folks. Hope you like what you see because I am quite serious about the cartoon campaign. If anyone who is reading this thinks this is a good endeavour, please do contact me. I could use some help.

Firefox Campaign Redux

Here is a more serious attempt at the Firefox flicks community video ad campaign which is based on the previously mentioned idea of a public broadcast message wherein, we start out with a scientist in a lab-coat taking us through the life of grumpy young kids.
"Every single hour of every single hour, kids resort to being disagreeable. Many reasons have been attributed to this but our social research team at Firefox has been able to find out the root cause. It is the browser."
We then cut to frames as shown below. Fights, kid-sister, anger at the family dinner. The mom who is concerned comes by and consoles him telling about Firefox by typing the URL (this frame has to be added). The kid uses it. Is blown away and comes to the dinner, apologizes, hugs his parents and gives the repaired toy to his kid sister. Owww... the voice continues - "Happy parents all over the world have discovered the joy Firefox brings to their families. Have you?". Then of course, there is a rapid - "Issued in public interest by the society for happy parents of Firefox" (this is just a dialogue). Here are the frames -

some more effort

Also, here is another long idea which I think could be quite funny and which I will attempt next -
Firefox Ad-Flick - Surgery
We start with something being brought into an intensive care unit. The doctors are ready to start surgery. The people related to the operatee are tense and waiting outside. You know, typical hospital drama. There are tense doctors. They are running all around. There is exchange of knives and scissors. And the ad kicks into action.
The surgeons are taking out the scum that browsers add to a computer. Bugs, viruses, malware, spyware, porn, pop-ups and what not. All gruesome and stomach-churning. While this is going on, the people are expectant. Pacing around. Doctors and nurses would not talk to them and give them angry looks.
The main surgeon comes out and explains the situation. That the damage they have done to the computer and to themselves in the process is undefinably gross and sad. But they can cure it if they can promise one thing. Never to use any other browser than the one they will be putting in right now. They promise. And we cut to a glowing Firefox put into the machine. The machine kicks to life. And the people come beside the bed and reminiscence. The operation is successful.

YACEP - Yet Another Chicken Egg Problem

It is a belief scientifically held that for an egg to hatch, the temperature has to be perfect. Is it not a wonder then that the bosom of a hen (or any bird for that matter) is exactly that temperature as is required for the egg to hatch?

I mean, which of this happened first? The hens determining the temperature or the eggs needing that temperature? It is rather tempting to say that the determination must have happened first. But then, how did nature figure out this temperature (no one put a thermometer in those unmentionable parts) and more importantly, how did this information got transferred. Come to think of it, even if the converse is true (that is hens adapted to the requirements of the eggs), it has to be pondered how did the hens get to know of the temperature and how did they eventually control their bosoms to create that specific temperature.

Criminals and Community Service

It is just sad that community service is usually done by people as forced by law for a felony. No wonder no good ever comes out of it.


I mean, there is this guy who is a petty thief. He is caught and asked to do some kind of community service. What is supposed to happen? What is the whole logic behind it?

Sunday, January 28, 2007

Aaja Ve - Sona

Sona's "Aaja Ve" is clutter-breaking. I don't quite know where to place it. It vaguely reminds me of some obscure hindi songs from the 90s (which ones, I don't remember). This sound is so simple, so fresh, so earthy, so desi, so much fun, so happy... Here goes -
The video is IMO a bit overdone (the dancing villagers), but I still like it. At least there's no corny improbable story desperately trying to touch your heart.

Friday, August 11, 2006

Microsoft Interviews

These are the questions I have been asked during my in-process Microsoft interviews thus far. I have a final in-person one as and when I go to India and that could be make or break things. So, all fingers crossed. Anyway, here are the Q'n'A -
1) My take on Inverted Indexes (discussed over tech-screen)
To me, inverted indexes and databases store data in a highly compressed manner and I am quite fascinated by this compression characteristics because to me, they are like layers of an onion. Or like folding of protiens. The shape of the structure and how it has folded is a world onto itself.
2) Camel and bananas puzzle (asked during tech-screen)
Q: A camel has to take 3000 bananas across the desert over 1000kms. It is a very hungry camel and eats 1 banana for every KM. How many could it possibly take across if it can at any point carry a load of 1000 bananas?
Answer-1: The first non-tricky solution is depending on the rate at which the camel consumes a banana. If we assume it to be not instantaneous, then it would have to eat the banana for some time and as per reverse-normalization, the number of bananas it can eat over the journey would only be so many. The rest would be carried over on every trip.
Answer-2: (given later by phone/email)
Basically, the answer to the problem is _400_ if we want to minimize the number of trips and this is based on trying to get the final load to be as close to 1000 as possible. The approach is that the camel starts with 1000, goes to 400 kms of the distance, uses 400 bananas, drops 200 bananas and consumes the rest of the 400 bananas on the return. It does the same for the next 1000.
And the last 1000, it goes to the 400kms, has 600 left, picks up the 400 lying there and starts the journey of remaining 600 kms with 1000 bananas. At the end of the trip, it delivers 400.
This solution holds for a minima on the number of straight trips (not the number of kms/paces) because I think that more than 400 bananas can be shipped if the camel uses the same break-down approach in a discrete manner.
3) Describe yourself as a Software Design Engineer (HR-screen)
I am not a dirty geeky coder. I like coding and it is a very pleasurable experience but I believe that one should respect the principles of software engineering wherever possible and try to minimize not only the amount of coding but also the complexity of it. Because, coding takes only 20% of the life-cycle but if not done properly, the up-keep of it and the maintainence could get unwieldy.
Most of the time, I try to use joined-up approaches and use 3rd-party libraries because they have been extensively tested before. Ultimately, I think I am an engineer more than a programmer.
4) Describe one instance giving evidence of your Program Management (HR-screen)
It was during the MultiXP project. We were to make pitches to NESTA and we were building the prototype. The business manager stressed that what we were to pitch should be eye-catching even if the technology behind it was not mature or even identifying with the ethos of the project.
It was a hard decision to make but we did it for the sake of the project that has to impress people who would be funding us. So, we went on to implement translation and reading-out-loud in a roundabout manner first. It was another matter that we did implement the core technology because I pitched in with the coding but it made me realize that sometimes, you have to be flexible and re-prioritize things.
This also involved communicating the change of plans to the team which I found harder than the actual technical bit. I had to lead them into the reasoning and had to time it and take their input and concerns before re-scheduling and planning.
5) Talk about the future of search in your own words (job-screen)
- First discussion went that the future would be on local search using the sneakers example. But this is much more deeper than simple local shop listings on the web as could be the first impression. Let me rephrase the scenario. A guy is interested in buying sneakers. He has somehow decided which one to buy. From a friend or by browsing a web-site. Now how do we match his choice to the best offer out there?
A web-site(s) might have a good offer but what about the local shoe-store which could have a better offer like a clearance sale? This local store does not have a web-site. Even if it did, it should go through the "process" of being in the right vicinity and ranks to be in the results and compete with the big guys. How can we match this user to this offer in the simplest possible manner? That is the future problem and potential of search. The key here is not only about improving the results but also, if not more so, for improving advertisement handling because in this case, the local shoe-shop need not maintain a web-site or anything. Rather, the owner register the ephemeral offer with MSN (just like they would post a classified to a newspaper). This offer is what should match and perhaps come on the results page. No web-site required and the classified listing itself should be as simple as sending an email or an SMS message. Like say, "<Barcode-ID> <Price> <Shop>". Or a phone call. The Barcode-ID (on back of shoe-box) would be resolved to a full-blown description on MSN to come on the listings. Yes, MSN does need to do some major work to make this happen.
The future of search to me is in plugging local businesses and their offers with search in a smart manner. That should level the playing field and also as per the long-tail fundae, cater to most users who more often than not use the web (or want to) to buy more useful (on daily basis), antiquated and rare material. As per the long-tail again, the amount of business generated (if the listing is made simple and fair) would far outdo the business that search currently generate as per the 80:20 principle. Yes, search is primarily for information but the example would be giving details of an expert on the topic of "local search" in the neighbourhood (or someone who has a blog on the topic but lives around) so that the user can drop by for a visit. I know for example, that there is someone out there on the street that is offering cheese for a huge discount because it is last day or something. I want to know that for I love cheese. In fact, these classifieds could be delivered as an RSS feed or whatever to users. PUSH and PULL. I would filter for cheese and be first in line to the shop that has the special offer in the corner shop.
- Let us move on the next top-level scenario I identified which is that the future of search will be in how well MSN can cater to the next 80% of users who would become online. The next 6 billion people so to speak. They would become online mostly using mobile devices not computers. These are going to be people who have never and will probably never touch a PC in their life. Like the farmers and milk-wallah's of India if Airtel adverts have to be believed.
What would they search for? More important than that, how would they? Because, would it be the case that they will use keywords? Combine this with the complexity of language. These are over and above the problems with the core mobile UI (like entering words). Using MSN over mobile phones is not what is under discussion but rather, what other ways can search be done and how MSN can benefit from the huge numbers at stake? With the farmer example, the farmer could take a picture of his brinjal produce and get results for their market price. Or point to a poster (like movies or polio) on the wall and get the information and listings (this is good for a Western audience too). Or how about he calling someone and explaining the query in a local language? Where is the monetization? Well, it is in the communication itself.
- In the third instance, I was trying to combine the above of local search and mobile search because mobile search has the added advantage that it gives fine-grained location information to the resolution of say, streets. This can be used to good effect in local search in many cases not only for re-ranking, disambiguation, matching users with their search needs and locale et al.
In fact, I submitted a document called BlueWeb to Nelia which addresses such issues and more.
6) How would you go about designing a digital camera for teenagers (job-screen)
- This is not such a hard thing to do if one understands what teenagers are after which is not hard because everyone has been a teenager. So, the solution is to have a stream of fad-oriented "look" for the digital camera. Like the example of U2 (black and red) or a recent movie or cult like Star Wars. Use the digital camera in promotion with such big events like launches or concerts. In other words, "skin" the digital camera. The outer covers can be changed. Nokia had such a thing so also Titan Raaga watches. This gives flexibility for teenagers to be "hip" with the latest trend which change at quite a fast rate. Raging hormones. It is basically about expressing themselves and their fanhood.
- Second aspect to it is the software. Make the cameras into utility swiss-knives. Teenagers like to show things off and tell to their mates how cool their product is and that it can do this and that. The camera has a screen and speaker. So, why not use it as a music player or video player (most cameras capture videos but how about playing downloaded content such as viral videos?) The hardware is already there.
- Third aspect is sharing. Teenagers tend to socialize a lot and share things while they are at it. It is one thing to show a picture and another to actually transfer it. P2P was and is mostly a teenage sensation. So, could we make the camera transfer without using PC or CD etc. and do it on the spot? Well, there is something called Pictbridge (perhaps specific to Canon) to communicate with printers. Can we use that or similar? Perhaps yes. Some digicams come with Bluetooth as well which is P2P technology anyway. Or perhaps maybe design the camera lens such that it fits snugly to the screen and a picture can be transferred (with some loss) directly using the screen and electro-staticity(?). Or a cable which is built into the camera perhaps? Or a jigsaw arrangement?
7) Prove that the middle number between twin primes is divisible by 6 (job-screen)
Q: Twin primes are two prime numbers that are seperated by a distance of 2. For example, 11 and 13. 5 and 7. 17 and 19 etc. The middle number of twin primes has a property that it is a multiple of 6. Prove this.
Answer-1: In the call, I said I would use induction over the twin primes. For 5 and 7 the middle number is 6. For 11 and 13, it is 12. So, if we can prove it for 1 and K, then, the property holds. The hint I was given is that to prove this, I can use the divisibility property of 6 that if a number is divisible by 2 and 3, then it is divisible by 6. So, the middle number can be generalized to a form and proved for the divisibility by 2 and 3. I used the property of primes being odd-numbers etc.
Answer-2: (over email)
A better solution is let, A, B, C be the 3 numbers in question. With A and C are the primes seperated by a distance of 2. The side-effect of this situation is that A, B, C are consecutive numbers and B = (A+C)/2 (as with any 3 consecutive numbers).
Now, all primes are expressible in a sum of powers of 3 and 2. So, A could be generalized as (2^m + 3^n) and C as (2^p + 3^q). Hence -
B = ((2^m + 3^n) + (2^p + 3^q))/2
  = ((2^m + 2^p) + (3^n + 3^q))/2
Let us take the denominator out which is 2. The first sum-of-2's is divisible by 2. The second sum-of-3's is always an even number and so divisible by 2. So, the denominator could be silent. So, B could still be expressed as a sum of 2's and sum of 3's.
To prove that B is divisible by 6, I will use the hint that we have to prove that it is divisible by 2 and 3.  For 2, as above, it is trivial. For 3 again, the sum-of-3's is divisible by 3. The trick bit is that the sum-of-2's be divisible by 3 because this property does not hold for all possible values of 'm' and 'p' (for example 2^2 + 2^4 = 20 which is not divisible by 3). However, we can use the property of the twin primes (probably the key to this) in that the possible values of 'm' and 'p' (in this situation) can only be consecutive numbers. So, the sum-of-2's is always divisible by 3.
8) Circular jail puzzle (job-screen)
Q: There is a circular jail with 100 cells. A jailer one night gets drunk and tipsy and runs around the jail opening the doors such that for every Nth round, he opens doors which are multiples of N. He runs around for 100 times and drops down tired. How many doors will be open now?
Answer: The answer is 10.
The solution is based on the property of factoring which I alluding during the call. Now, for any number in 1 to 100 and which can be factored, factoring is complementary i.e. if a number N is divisible by a number P, Q times, then it is also divisible by Q, P times. So, every factorable number gets closed because the number of factors (would become even and toggling puts them in the initial state of closed. This applies even for primes because 1 is a factor and so also the number itself.
The only anamolies are those numbers which are squares (1, 4, 9, 16, 25, 36, 49, 64, 81, 100 - total of 10). They are factorable in other ways but they do not have a complementary in one case (they have but it is the same number). So, they remain open.
Example, 50 = (1x50) * (2x25) * (5x10) = 12 toggles (including complementary rounds of (10x5), (25x2) etc.) = Closed
36 = (1x36) * (2x18) * (3x12) * (4x9) * (6^6) = 17 toggles = Open
In fact, this is a general solution for any number of cells. For any N, the number of gates opened for this situation is the number of squares in the range.
8) Describe how mobiles can be made as a replacement for credit cards (job-screen)
- I will not go into the area where mobile phones can be used to make small payments as with certain iMode services in Japan and concentrate on mobile phones as a straight replacement for credit-cards.
- The first solution of the user entering the number (of merchant ID and cost as put on the bill) as an SMS message and getting the validation back is a quick solution perhaps because in UK one can do that to an extent on TV shows. I was thinking of the reciept coming through to the merchant by SMS too as he could register himself to the bank perhaps. But I do take the point of getting reciepts etc.
- The next solution was to use something like IR or Bluetooth or even GSM signals (something like jammers exist) to give the credit card details to the merchant (which is what they really seek). This was the first solution that striked me but I thought it would be cumbersome to give the mobile phone to a waiter in a restaurant (which is the use-case I am aware of personally). Anyway, this could be done and it does mean that the merchant has to install/upgrade the equipment at his premises. The security would be a personal PIN on the phone. For the merchant, the easiest way is of course to have both forms of payment as you indentified but would it be possible for the merchant to NOT do anything on his premises?
- Well, we never got to this point but how about using magnetism? The Bluetooth/IR is only a replacement to send the information on the credit-card which works via a magnetic strip. Can't we work on a solution that uses magnetism? Maybe the credit card company would send a magnetic strip (or a chip) that could be stuck on the back of the mobile. This has the disadvantage of changing mobile phones though.
- More technical solutions could be to use the speaker hole. You know, the headphone jack. This is universal for all mobiles. At the merchant, the cable would be plugged and the user can give the details. Talking of universality how about the credit-card details told using audio pulses (like how DTMF works) or the number coming on screen as a bar-code that can be scanned?
- It could still be the case that there is new equipment somewhere and that has to be justified and your points on how one can convince the merchant to put these new "scanners" (new market trend explanation) is probably best. I was more or less thinking of the manual swipes (that hand machine) who are merchants who do not know or want to use technology even if the electronic swipe exists. I suppose this is not the market we are aiming for. Or they can leap-frog.

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Religion is an Intelligent Business Empire!

Religion means different things to different people. No disputing that. But if one thinks hard about it, religion is basically a bloody brilliant intelligent business empire. And each religion is like a seperate company out to get as many customers as they can. Use propoganda to convert them and whatever. Plain simple corporatism. If this statement does not convince the reader to be taken at face value, please be reminded that religion has a hierarchical big-brother structure. Has spin and PR and viral marketing teams. Religion even has logos and merchandize (read, symbols) for Gods (somehow this is apt) sake :-) Frankly, the infrastructure that has been laid out centuries ago is quite impressive. And it has been all so strongly cemented that most people do not question their existence at all. Religion is a meme that has got into our conciousness and indeed our genes.

Anyway, am not implying that religion is pure evil. No corporation ever is because no matter what they do, they still provide jobs and livelihood to some people. It is converse with religion though. All we humans seem to remember is the atrocities that religion has brought about. But we forget that religion has made it possible for billions of people throughout human history to live in some kind of a jolly fog. Best of all, religion has made acceptance of misery easier so much so that even death is a celebration! In other words, religion gives people some strange wonky reason to live. Even people who blame religion for everything bad that has happened are so obsessed with it that it is a reason in itself for them to live and sometimes, to earn their daily bread. Parasites.

Anyway, coming to the biggest achievement of religion. People have died and keep dying in the belief/faith that if they lived life by some principles, do or dont do some stuff, pay allegiance to a place of worship and divine symbols etc. they would be going to some special place. Hope is a good thing even if people are blissfully ignorant. I say religion is intelligent because it convinces almost every human that death is actually a good thing! It is like convincing people with cancer/AIDS/[insert fatal chronic condition] that this is the best thing that has ever happened to them. Or getting to pay their taxes with a smile. No business or marketing campaign thus far has ever achieved such a thing. Hmmm... one can include army as a corporation too that achieves such bliss I suppose. But it is a minion of religion really.

So, here is to being religious and dying happy.

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

GUd Life - 48 - Secret Terror Courts Considered
[via http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/4133564.stm]

BBC reports on the Home Office initiative to greenlight special secret courts for pre-trail hearings in terror cases.
Apart from the hilarity of the idea which is conveniently comic material (read the article), the emphasis is on the word 'secret'. Why make a noise about it? Anyway, here is my take on the 'secret' terror courts at large -

gud life - 47 - Secret terror courts considered

The whole thing sounds oxymoronish and mostly old-hat news since the fact is that everyone knows they are already in place in different forms. Duh, torture chambers and secret services are abound and the system will neither confirm nor deny their existence. Wow, this is a conspiracist remark!

On Rich becoming Richer and other effects

There is an old saying that the rich become richer and poor become poorer. This is also the 80:20 rule. Or Zipf curve or Pareto or whatever. Basically, it means, the rich people keep getting richer and the poor people keep getting poorer.

I argue that what we see is just one effect which leads onto the other. I say that what we see in this world is only the rich getting richer. People getting poorer is thus purely relative and is a consequence of the former. Anyway, the theory I propose is that the phenomenon of rich getting richer is obvious and is inherent given our sociological constructs. Lemme explain.

Imagine you are a painter. A very bad painter who has no real clue what you paint about. Just like almost all self-proclaimed artists. For most people it is just a dab of random colors. But somehow some idiot art critic (an 'art crtitic' would suffice since they are so idiotic that they cannot even splash colors on canvas on their own), thinks you are a genius/fool and brings the sky down hyping you and your art for better or worse. Writing an essay or a review. Of course, any publicity is publicity. Either way, the public is curious and they come swarming in.
You become rich by a couple of score millions because nowadays people are like sheep with no real opinion of their own. Their entire sophistication is based on reading reviews in New Yorker magazine. People even buy art as an investment these days and not to appreciate the passion and nuances (which of course your painting has none). All this holds you in good stead. In short, you become filthy stinking rich.
Well, a painter is just one example. But the same effect can be seen if you happen to write a book about witchcraft (we dont burn them anymore but we should make some exceptions), or croon horrendously to entice people to kill themselves and whatever. You have to believe me because the pop-singers who sing love songs do not know what it is to be in love when they change their lovers like underwear. Still not convinced. How about an idiot who collects the polluted air of Paris in a jar and that is projected as a great piece of art questioning the ephemeral nature of things and the universality of humankind so much so that there is a seminar to understand the depth of it while he is dead for a while now. As if this wasnt cracking enough, his great-grand-daughter is reaping the benefits of preserving that piece of crap and is now hogging the limelight. All she ever did was born to his grand-daughter.

Anyway, come back to making you the painter as a running example. You are now rich and that is because of one art sale. In the future, if you make any sort of painting, or just sign a 6 year old child's painting by mistake, or steal some from a barnyard where the images formed are pigs humping each other, they are all still gonna make you rich. Because the aforementioned art critics will try to see some deep meaning in your doodles where there arent any. And you cannot help but become more rich and famous no matter what you do.
You sneeze and the Kleenex used will be sold on eBay. You write your dull, boring, insipid, uninspiring story of your life including how you stole money from your mom's purse for drugs at 10 and that book generates royalty in the millions. The rolling stone just gathers more mass and more mass and more mass. There could however be a whiff of dissent in a naive guy who actually sees through you and says that what you do is crap. The more educated art critics would dismiss this simple guy's interpretations. And you will say - "art has never been appreciated by the public in its own time" - and get away with it. Life moves on.
So, you see, all it takes is for an idiot to hype up your work and the world will be different since for a lot of people. Talk about chaos, butterfly effect and sensitive dependence on initial conditions. All you have to do is try to find such blokes. Fortunately, there are many out there but it is all about being in the right place at the right time amidst the right people.

Now, for the second effect. Why poor become poorer. First of all, there is a relative effect. If you become richer, your classmates in high-school become poorer. They do not have the 720-inch plasma screen TV as you have, see. But this effect is far-reaching. Let us talk about absolute poverty. That follows from the above quite tightly since when people spend their earnings on buying your junk, then they have hardly anything left to donate towards things that matter like you know, donate to Red Cross or something where they could actually be doing something good and noble (heaven forbid). No wonder that every 1 second, a child somewhere in this world dies of hunger and disease. Now death is an expensive proposition in any culture and so the poor people spend some more on... err... death and taxes. And hence the poor gets poorer.

There is just no way to escape this vicious cycle. We humans are wired that way I suppose. Rich become richer. A harsh reality imposed by sheer brute force sociological behaviour of humans. Hence proved.
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